Focus

Game Update

We keep moving along slowly but with intent to finish this project. Last week we did a play test to better understand the changes that we had been making and how they were impacting the player. We also looked for some quick fix items as well with the play through. I’m now worried that the player isn’t gaining experience fast enough. This has been a bit of a fine tuning exercise as originally the player gained levels way to fast.

The big change is that we have surfaced the descriptions for the abilities assigned to all the player characters in the Force Organization screen. This is a big deal as our area of effect damage abilities vary widely. Some of the abilities only hit the center 3 columns while others randomly hit the entire enemy squad for instance. It’s always a balance when thinking about how much information to give to the player compared to trying to use affordance instead. (Yes affordance is a real word there’s an Extra Credits video that explains it well)

We’re also looking at giving more visual cues during combat to ensure that the player has a good grip on how their squad composition choices are effecting combat. This might prove to be more difficult than originally thought because the combats are pseudo-simultaneous. It might be to overstimulating to have to many particle effects launching at the same time.

Personal Update

The last of the boxes in the house are cleared out in the common areas and I will be dropping what’s left off with family nearby to use in an upcoming move of their own. It’s nice to have the house finally come together although there are about 100 different little things that still need to be accomplished to bring everything into alignment.

I have been socializing off and on, although it hasn’t been a major focus for me. That said I recently made a difficult decision that will allow me more life focus. It’s important to be decisive sometimes, but also compassionate with our life decisions. I hope to have the ability to speak more specifically in the future but it’s probably to early right now. I will say that I’m very happy.

Hope

Game Update

This week I focused on adding a little more bells and whistles to the town capture. We now have some extra sounds and a particle effects which add a lot. I still need to change the odds from 50/50 to something that reflects the player choices a little better. I want to tie it to the reputation so that as your rep goes up you have a better chance to get positive effects and as it goes down there’s a better chance to get poor effects.

The other items I need to focus on this week is the key art for the game as well as the spreadsheets. I already started working on the player skills and that might be a better thing to get working so I can take some high quality screen shots for the key art. Adding particle effects is kind of a big deal here.

Personal Update

I’m still waiting on all my household goods to arrive, and this week will be interesting as I’ll most likely be alone for Christmas this year. Just another day for me I suppose. It’s fine as I have plenty to keep me busy in the meantime. My shipment is getting here so late that I’m asking that my children have another week away so I can set up the house.

The more time I spend in my house and in the area here, the more blessed I feel. I’m leaning towards naming my gecko Hope now. I learned a lot from this little guy so far. One major thing is that you can’t really control it. Just like children or players. You put them in a situation and you think you know how they will react but often they do something you haven’t even thought of.

I went out to a country club in the local area this weekend. What a great experience! It’s been so long since I’ve been in a club social setting. I felt like I might have a hard time relating to people and getting social again, but it was like riding a bike for me. All of the things that I did back in 2019 came back. I didn’t go in with any specific expectations. I just wanted to dance a bit, get a drink, and talk to some locals. It really made me feel like things were getting back to normal finally in our society. Other parts of the country seem to be more strict still.

Plenty more to work through. I’m excited to see what the future holds!

Echoes, Silence, Patience & Grace

Game Update

A little late on this update, but I’m still chugging along. This week we worked on a lot of the sounds in the game. I listened to around 1000 different beeps and boops to find something I wanted for the various spots in the game. We also started to juices up the sounds when we take over a town. We added a booing sound when the God figure “tests” your characters by lowering stats and a cheering sound when you get a “blessing” and they increase. I still feel like this should be tied to reputation or possibly a hidden deity score based on your choices in the game.

I’ve been picking up some more motivation to get things done in game as I started finally cleaning up the spreadsheets. The issue with those seems to be that I have so many at this point I have a hard time finding the latest ones. I didn’t do a good job of making sure I know which ones are being used and which ones aren’t. It’s a bit of a mess and I’ll have to look through them.

On the positive side I have started making changes to the abilities. I’m finally utilizing the new Area of Effect (AOE) attack modes that I added so long ago. Some attacks split damage among enemies while others do flat damage. I also like that I can target certain rows or columns. This allows me to tailor certain attacks a little more with higher damage to have less targets available.

Personal Update

I’m finally starting to stabilize in my new house. I have a couple more things to set up for my kids. It’s been about a 5 year journey to get here and it feels good but it also feels like something is missing. I might need some time alone, but I’m not sure. I’ve been living in this temporary state of always saying, “I’m moving so this is temporary” for so long that I may not know how to deal with settling in one place now. 20 years of moving does that to someone I suppose.

Add to that I’m sitting in a void waiting for my household good which will arrive just in time for me to not have enough time to get my household situated for before my children arrive. It’s pretty frustrating, but I can’t be to mad because all said and done God really provided for me and my family during this global crisis. Still the last year feels really bad. Like a perfect crescendo to a lot of failures in leadership over my military career. I had a couple good ones too, and some lucky things. All said and done when I talk to other friends about what they’ve been doing for the past 20 years it makes me feel a bit better. I wouldn’t say that I wouldn’t change anything, but there are worse places I could be right now.

It’s so important to stay thankful for the time we have, and the blessings afforded to us in times like this. I’m very blessed and I need to keep that in mind. I have to keep going and stick with it or else I’ll be like so many other failed projects. I need to keep in mind I’m not doing this so other people can clap for me, I’m doing this to prove to myself that I can do it.

Settling in with a Gecko Roommate

Game Update

I missed a week of game development with my mentor last week as I hadn’t moved into my house nor did I have internet last week. I managed to get online just in time this week however and we did make some headway on a couple of items.

We primarily worked on updating a sound that happens when the player takes over a town depending on the buff or de-buff that get’s rolled for the player. A cheering sound now plays when the player gets a buff and a booing sound plays when there’s a de-buff. I’m still trying to find solid sounds that will be enjoyable for the player however. It’s impossible to find just the right sound and now I know why being a sound engineer is it’s own talent set.

I think I finally found a good sound for the go button. It kind of reminds me of the horns sounds in the song “Losing It” by Fisher. The baaaaaa horn sound really gives an oomph when I push the button now. I’m not sure it’s the exact thing I want but it seems pretty good so far. The only issue is that when the button gets pressed by the computer because the timer runs out there is no sound. I may need to find a work around for that.

I worked on some text sounds as well. Right now it’s only playing a slight knock sound when advancing text. This is pretty good but it might be better to do the conventional RPG thing and make a beep-boop-beep-boop sounds as text scrolls on the box. The issue is that text doesn’t scroll on our boxes it simply appears. This might go back to one of our tenants which is to make sure that the game play is fast. If we choose to add scrolling text that will make the stages longer. Then again scrolling text is more fun to read, and it might be more engaging for our players than simply having appearing text instead. This might be why that’s the standard you see in so many RPG games. I feel like I need some advice so I reached out to an industry friend of mine and hopefully we can get a phone call in sometime soon.

Other than that I still need to get the capsule art worked out and author some other content like the spell particle effects for the game. It feels like I’m almost ready to set a date for early access though. I hope that the game is fun for people and that someone out there really likes it.

Personal Update

I’ve talked a lot about moving lately and now I’m finally here. It feels very comforting to finally be somewhere that I can settle for a while. Somewhere where I don’t have to say to myself, “this is OK it’s only temporary.” It hasn’t been a completely smooth transition but I’m seeing where things will hopefully be really good here.

When I did the walk around at my house there was a small gecko in my kitchen sink. It was still there when I closed on the house and he stayed there for the following week. Well I decided that it needed a home and so I purchased a terrarium for it and some other supplies. I’m a bit worried about it starving or not getting enough water. It doesn’t seem to want to eat the bugs that I got for it. I’m learning a lot about geckos right now I suppose. I don’t have a name for it, and I’m not even sure if it’s male or female.

It’s funny how you can become attached to such a small thing like that. I suppose I have something inside of me that wants to help people or animals where I can. Still I need to make sure to have boundaries as well. That’s the key thing about being kind that doesn’t get talked about enough.

I’m not sure but the gecko might be teaching me some things about myself as well. Some of my family in the area came to visit and it completely disappeared in the terrarium. It was very confusing for me and I looked for it multiple times. I thought it might have escaped somehow but that seemed like a near impossibility. It turns out that it had burrowed down into the sub strait and I found it again today.

When it happened I thought to myself, “why do I care so much about this thing?” It’s not as if it was my child or something like that. It’s probably related to what Eckhart Tolle talks about in “A New Earth”. He talks about how we as humans associate ourselves with things, when in reality we aren’t those things. I noticed it in myself when I was writing the address for my new house in so many places to take ownership, set up billing cycles or do any number of other things. I started to associate myself with my house. In that way if something were to happen to my house it would be like something was actually happening to me. I’m not my house, but in a lot of ways we all do this. The saying goes, “don’t take it personally” but it’s very hard not to.

Very soon I’m sure that I will be investing in a lot of new things, and associating them with myself. I need to make sure to keep in mind that those things are not me, they’re just things.

As a side note the Gecko doesn’t have a name yet. I’m open to suggestions. My mom wants to name it George. I was thinking Hope or something similar to that. I’ve felt a lot of hope lately in my new home, with my new job, and new life here. I’m very hopeful for the future of my household.

Happy Thanksgiving

Game Update

We finished fixing some more interface problems with some inconsistencies with the way the buttons were functioning. That was a quick fix and we started moving back into focusing on the Capsule Artwork. It might be a good idea to add a build to my laptop to do screen caps and work on the art. I seem to do better with working on artwork using my laptop anyway. I guess it takes me back to working on 3D models in Blender 3D. I’m hoping that once I have the game built I will be able to keep making more levels and 3D models to keep adding to the game.

I’m a little worried about the plot line and some of the human interest parts of the game. I haven’t added any functionality to the game to allow the player to make choices during the levels. I’m not sure the dialogue is all that great.

I haven’t had any word come back from the lawyer that I retained, and I don’t think I will hear anything until after the holiday. I’ll re-engage after I move and settle. It is on my mind, along with a lot of other things lately.

I’m a little worried about my motivation over this time period. I think that paying a mentor all this time has helped me keep focus even in times like this. I have time every week blocked out to work, even if I don’t get anything done in between sessions.

Personal Update

Getting ready for this move has been the primary thing on my mind lately. Lining everything up and dealing with inevitable delays. It will be good to have everything settled next month. I’m not sure how much time I’ll be able to put into game development while I’m transitioning and adapting to my new job.

Thanksgiving is at the end of the week, and this year is going to be tough for everyone. I’m lucky to be spending it with my parents this year right before my transition. It brings back memories of last year. I was in a really happy place and everything seemed to be falling into place. Little did I know then that I might have been laying the ground work for the biggest love loss of my life. It still weighs on me and it’s been difficult to move forward and really allow my heart to love again. It’s not as if I haven’t met anyone in since then. I just need to make sure live in the present and not in the past. Giving appreciation for the time I was allowed back then.

I can’t say to much but recent events have made me a lot more aware of how I’m attracted to certain traits that aren’t good for me or my boys in the long run. It’s frustrating because when I meet someone that is a good thing they are less attractive to me. I’ve had to really take a hard look at myself and fight my own instincts that way. Still I keep moving forward hoping to break the cycle. I’m sure that my new life in Florida will have all new adventures to embark on.

Winter is Coming, Possibly a Long One

Game Update

This week I spent some time on the legal side of the game. I spoke to a lawyer about some of the steps I can take to protect certain parts of the game. They will also be reviewing contracts with distributors for me to make sure that everything is on the up and up. It’s possible that I’m spending money on things I can’t afford, but I think it’s valuable to go through the processes even if the game is a flop. It will be important to have the knowledge of walking through the process. Just like they say in self development, “your brain wants proof not promises.” This simply means that you can explain a concept to someone and tell them what to do until you are blue in the face, but until they take steps to actually do it they won’t truly believe it deep down in their core.

We are shoring up some of the problems with the leader system and it seems like we’ve punched through so that won’t be an issue for our players. One of the big problems was setting a leader for a squad which when removed would still be assigned. This created a problem where levels could be started with leaderless squads causing havoc on the systems.

I still need to go back and clean up the starting squads for the players as well as looking to balance some of the abilities of the troops. I’m doing a lot of experience gain tweaking right now. It’s important to get down just how the numbers “should feel” for a good game.

I’m still thinking about a hard mode for the game and it might be interesting to rev up some of the bonuses for troops/spells being used when they match up with their terrain in hard mode. It might also be interesting to give troops a large negative like -50% damage when they are in opposing areas.

Personal Update

The next 2 weeks are going to be very busy filled with a lot of driving for me. I will be taking my children to be with my ex-wife as well as transitioning to my new job in Florida. I’m excited, but I know there will be a lot of work ahead. It’s been a long road to get to a place where I will feel like I can settle for a while. I expect that I won’t have a lot of time to work on the game as I tear down my setup. I should move some files over to my laptop to keep working on some simple things. I still need to re-name all the stages on the map as all the names that are there right now are silly place holder names.

I did my best to take in the time I spent in my home town to appreciate where I came from so long ago. This is the longest I’ve lived at home since I left 20 years ago. Staying with my parents again has opened my eyes to some things as well that I wasn’t completely aware of before I did all the self development. I might even be leaving here with some really good news! Fingers crossed!

Should I do Items?

Game Update

Fixing more problems this week that are minor ones with simple fixes. I also think that I might be able to add some simple items or something to allow players a little more agency with their team. You’re always balancing the scales between giving the player a lot of choice to make things interesting and keeping things simple and accessible. The troop duplication feature might also make my item idea a little problematic.

The problem that I fixed was that at the end of levels there are a set of conditions to send the player to different follow on screens. I thought that I had all the possibilities covered but the level was soft locking at the end. Luckily I had placed a debug statement if all the conditions failed. I added a new condition and that fixed the problem. I was happy that I could parse it out quickly.

Chris and I are still working through some of the issues with the tactics on the Force Organization screen. I feel like it’s 90% where it needs to be. It’s good enough for early access.

For a long time I thought that I couldn’t add any items to the game until the second iteration of the game. I woke up today and thought to myself, “I have a system during stages that’s increasing and decreasing stats on troops when we take over towns and so I should be able to take that machinery and leverage it for single use items.” It might be pretty simple, and I might even be able to use it for consumable. With a little work I might be able to make equipable items as well. The only question is how simple will it be, and how much value will it add to the game. I like the idea of having other things for the player to spend money on as well as adding something random to the stages that the player can earn.

Personal Update

I’m still going through the house purchasing process as well as figuring out the time table for the transition. I realized that the holiday events might be a little difficult this year and so I’ve done some preparing ahead.

I took some time with my boys last weekend to do something special as I know things will be hectic later. I’m sure that I will miss my hometown when I’m gone, but I’m ready for the next adventure. It’s been about 3 years since I’ve had a place that wasn’t something that was transitional. I’m happy for the time I’ve had while I was at home and I took a lot of chances on some possibilities while I was here as well. I had the chance to see places I hadn’t been too, meet really cool girls, and even DJ at a local bar which paid me. I’m glad that I had this time here and I feel like the things that happened over the last couple months will have an impact on me that I’ll carry with for some time to come (possibly even longer than expected).

Opportunity Knocks

Game Update

This week was really interesting and productive. It started off with a message over LinkedIn from last weeks update. I had the COO of ESports Labs contact me. I followed up with him later in the week and we discussed putting the game up on the Esports platform. The platform is doing a lot of what has been asked for by Twitch and YouTube content creators for a while now. Namely, they want the ability to connect directly to the community and allow viewers to purchase the game that they are playing with a little kickback. It’s specifically focused on small creators as they build up their framework. I’m not sure if I can talk about the percentages but it’s a solid deal for game developers and streamers which is a great thing for the industry. In the book the 21 immutable laws of marketing they talk about creating new things and being the first to market with it. This is one of those products which is very exciting!

I have to do some research and talk to some people before I sign but the deal is very enticing. To be clear Six Aspects is still slated to release on Steam and this will not effect that. They are not asking for exclusivity. It’s also nice to be validated by someone else in the games industry.

This week I worked primarily on building out the combat scene backgrounds a bit more. The distance that can be seen is further as we changed our fog settings. I enjoy building the levels and the backgrounds, it’s almost therapeutic.

The more we fix the more possible exploits or holes we find. Better to find them now than when it’s out on the Steam Store. The newest big ticket problems have to do with leaders in squads, and having all your troops destroyed in a stage, but not through combat. I’m also seeing late combats during the summary scene sometimes.

Personal Update

Things are still clipping along for my future move. It’s the typical thing you go through when you’re dealing with this sort of thing. You go to sleep one night thinking you have all the paperwork done and wake up the next day to discover that some all new paperwork has cropped up that you must do. Dates are shifting too but I know that I will have a lot of driving in my future. I’m looking forward to the next stage in my life but I have to make sure to stay present to what’s happening now too. It’s important to stay present to what’s happening.

Learn to Love Working (Re-Frame the Situation)

Game Update

Last week Chris and I worked on fixing a problem with the tactics system in game. The problem was that the leader on the squad needs to be set in order for the tactics to read properly. Additionally, if the tactics are set on a squad the button shows like they are set on the next squad. We’re working on fixing the issue and so far we have the tactics set up so that they wipe out when selecting new squads. We still need to set up an error message for the leader being set before selecting tactics.

We also took a look at the combat scenes with the new fog system and background. All the scenes look fine however the player can now see further which means that all the combat scenes need to be built out a little bit more. I look forward to working on the scenes to build them out a bit more. Building stages might have been one of the most natural things I’ve done throughout this process.

Personal Update

One of the questions that my mentor Chris asked me when he was vetting if he wanted to start working for me was about my gaming habits. It was something like, “how often do you play games? How much time do you spend doing that?” I answered that I had spent a lot of time in the past but that I had more recently been spending less and less time. Once I feel like I’ve accomplished what I wanted I usually move on.

That said I started moving through my life transition of retiring, getting a new job, closing on a new house, and having various relationships that haven’t worked out. Instead of working on my game, I was playing other games to help me cope and relax. I’ve spent a lot of time playing Slay the Spire. 410 hours as I look at my Steam library. Not to mention leveling a character in World of Warcraft which probably absorbed quite a few hours as well. Not all of that time was spent actively on the computer but it’s still time that could have been spent working on the game. So why wasn’t I doing it?

At a guess I’m doing it because I’m trying to “have fun and relax” and I “don’t want to do work at the end of my day after a day of work.” The issue is that I’ve framed the work situation as something that’s not enjoyable which has killed my motivation. I need to frame working on the game as something I enjoy doing, which I do from time to time. It needs to be something I re-wire my brain for. It’s time to put the games I’m playing down to work on my game to get it to market. Maybe I needed a break. I don’t feel bad or judge myself, but it’s time to get back to work. A new season needs to begin.

Is it Fun?

Like many indie developers I’ve seen Indie Game the Movie. In that movie the developer for the video game Fez asks the important question of “is my game good?” He was afraid he was focused so hard on making the game that he wasn’t sure if it was good anymore. I feel that way often at this point. I’m going to be doing a play through of the game to look for bugs and get some more screenshots for the Steam Capsule image. I’ve been looking at a lot of other games and I keep asking myself what makes these games fun or addictive and how I can leverage those things for my game.

Last week we added a button to allow the player to hide the combat UI the same way we’re doing during game play with the F5 button which will remain on release. I felt that players are going to want that option. It’s similar to what’s available in a lot of MMO’s when you want to take a nice screenshot.

I spent some time on my laptop working on character profiles. The general feel and purpose of the troops available to the player in game aren’t well defined well. We have not items in the game, and so the only thing we can give players are more troops or interesting troops. I may need to add items to the game when it’s in full release. There may not be enough options for players to feel like they are able to “play their own way.” That said if there are to many options then some players will likely feel overwhelmed. There’s a balance that needs to be struck. Another route we could go in is to make the characters have quality levels between 1-3 or 1-5. I’m not sure I like that idea but it would be an easy fix to add more quality levels for troops.

As I sit down and look forward to moving and starting my new job in Florida I’m thinking about my work area when I get there. I do have my desktop computer here with me but it’s not exactly the most conducive work area. I’m hoping I’ll get more work done when I’m there, but realistically I will have to keep choosing to get work done and pass up other things to finish. It’s so much easier to choose to slack off than to get work done. I need to focus and set aside time to work or I’ll never complete my goal and all my time will go to leisure. It will be important to have balance.

Most of my spare time this week went into closing on my house. It was very exciting as on Sunday night we didn’t see a lot of good options and then on Monday a very exciting house went on the market. I was lucky that my Mom was looking at houses with me as she was the one that spotted it. I looked at it and thought about it for about and hour or two. I contacted my realtor and secured a virtual walk through with her.

Things fell into place and I put a bid up on the house that day. I was lucky that I did as there were 2 other bids on the house that went in that day too. How lucky the sellers were to have so much interest so quickly! They had some more showings on Tuesday and late that night they decided to go with my bid. I was so relieved to finally have a home. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a place to belong where I truly felt was good enough for my family to live in. It did remind me of some past regrets too. I guess it’s been an emotional week.

The rest of the week was spent doing paperwork for the house, and trying to figure out timelines when I might be able to move. The way I’m looking at it the sooner I can close on the house the better. It will take some time to get my household shipment as well.

No More Excuses

And then I emerged from my cave after 3 months of being hidden from view. A lot had happened in the time that I was away, but I can’t just let the world pass by anymore.

After transitioning from the military, getting a new job, and figuring things out I lost a lot of interest and drive to work on the game. I’m so grateful to have a mentor like Chris to help me in times like this. Paying to meet with him as a mentor every week is what keeps the project moving forward even if it’s at a snails pace. I’m going to endeavor to keep the game updates toward the top of these blog entries and life updates towards the bottom while making it clear when I’m going into those ramblings to save you the trouble if you’re only interested in the game updates.

Game Update

Right now I’m working hard on getting the Steam “Capsule Artwork” completed. This is the artwork for the game that will be seen on the steam store. It looks a lot like a banner. It is basically the “branding” for the game. It’s something I know will be VERY important and so I’ve spent a lot of time with Chris working out a general concept idea of what we want it to be. I looked at around 100 steam art pieces with similar strategy genre titles. I played the game with an automatic screenshot program to capture shots of the game while playing and Chris and I found that the UI for the game was getting in the way. So the next time we met we created a hot key to hide the UI. It worked so well and I like it so much that I will be adding it to our options menu which only has the sound volume options at this moment.

Last week we did do some bug fixes, as I’m finding some soft locking that is happening with the game. It’s tough to say exactly what the cause is. I’m worried that our “Go Button” mechanic might be the culprit.

While playing the game I was excited to notice that the sound cues that I’ve started to add to the game have started to make a real difference in the overall experience. It’s a polish detail sure but it makes things really pop for me. There is a bit of an issue with normalizing the sound volume levels however.

In order to get the game to market the biggest thing in our way is getting the “Capsule Art” finished. I really want to get it as right as I can the first time. I know how big a deal branding is for every game. I’m trying to build art that showcases different classes and environments in it without being to busy. It’s a tall order but I know I can get it right.

Life Update

Transitioning out of the military has been a bit of a jarring experience. It was still a let down that the pandemic cancelled my plans in so many ways. It’s possible that God just didn’t want me to go in that direction though. I’ve found it very hard to stay present to the moment as my mind wanders back to mistakes I’ve made over my career or even in the last year. Things I can’t really change, time that doesn’t really exist anymore. Other times my mind wanders to the future with a new job on the horizon, a new house, costs to live there, the prospect of finding that special someone, and so many other little details. I need to spend more time in quiet contemplation becoming as present as possible. I need to enjoy this time of transition because it won’t be for much longer.

I have so many excuses not to work on the game, and it really comes down to what I choose to do. Instead of working on my passion project like I had planned I have

• Played World of Warcraft, phone games, or Slay the Spire

• Continued to date even though I’m moving

• Dealt with additional fallout from my failed marriage

• Took care of my parents needs (staying with them for now while I transition)

• House Hunting

• Netflix

• Set up insurance

• Put children in school

• Medical appointments for children

• Watched children more closely due to household situation

• Took children to parks

• Birthday parties for children

• DJ’d at bars

• Spent time with family

• Voted

I’m not saying these things are bad, or good. I’m not trying to beat myself up about it but it’s important to know where the time went. Life is about choices and every choice we make passes up a different path. Overall I’m happy with a lot of the things I was able to experience and do while I’ve been in my hometown again. It’s been a nostalgic journey, but I can’t help feel like I won’t be back again soon. It’s funny because a year ago I couldn’t imagine myself being in the position that I’m in right now, but here I am. I guess life has a way of taking sharp turns sometimes.

I think I want to try, I really want to get this game on the market. I need to make more choices to get this thing done and less choices that are indulgent. No more excuses, I had my fun now it’s time to work. I won’t say that I’m not going to mess up or get complacent again, but at least for today I’m ready to start pushing again.

This Our Independence Day!

It’s been a month of reflection for me as I prepare to move into the next phase of my life. I’m remembering last year on the 4th of July when I was visiting Austin, and enjoying the time I had there. I’m thinking back over my career in the military and how there were many things that didn’t go as I had pictured them. Maybe in some ways I feel a little bad when I think back on what I’ve seen which has created a lot of expectations for me. It’s so easy to go down a rabbit hole of expectations, just like I spoke about 2 weeks ago with the “Who Moved My Cheese” entry. I apologize for not doing an entry this past week, as that might have been an expectation that someone has for me. We always have to be ready for things not to go as planned for sure. There are many stories throughout our society where a lot of what we expected isn’t happening right now.

I feel it’s more important than ever to push out positive thoughts and hope right now. Eckhart Tolle talks a lot about how we have become “unconscious” in our society. We feel bad and so it’s difficult to give when we’re in a taking mindset. We’re numb to other peoples problems which makes us less empathetic. In a sense as a very logical person empathy is something I’ve had to work on greatly and I still get it wrong often.

Years ago when I was in one of my lowest point I heard about the concept of pushing out positive thoughts and actions without expectations. So I did that. I made an effort to be a positive force when I went to get coffee and then a surprising thing happened to me. I found that it came back to me from the other person and that I felt a little better about myself. The thing is few people feel comfortable being positive and pushing out those feelings, or there’s an expectation of getting something in return. After that I started branching out into pushing positive thoughts and actions at work, at home, even while running on my work out.

In the times when I get someone that didn’t respond or in the rare case when I had a negative response I re-frame it to attempt to be empathetic to their situation. Maybe they were caught off guard, maybe they are in a place where they simply can’t accept it. In any case that’s not something for me to dwell on. My day needs to be only 1% better if I get a good response from someone. I need to give the 99% and take the 1% back.

I watched Independence Day this morning and it made me think about the situation we’re all in right now as a nation. We have a common enemy in Corona Virus just like the Aliens in the movie. We have a lot of amazing stories about people fighting it and doing the right thing. Also in a minor role the movie shows looters, and individuals not heeding the warnings of the governing bodies. It’s sad but I hope that we can keep pushing forward like the heroes of the film instead of following in the footsteps of those minor characters.

I guess I should talk about game development on my game development blog too. Things are clipping along as Chris and I are building in sound options that will enable players to shut off music, or effects as well as controlling the master volume. Quality of life options that are important to the overall game. I’m looking forward to a time when things have settled down and I can really dig in without my transition hanging over my head. A lot of my time is going to World of Warcraft right now as I’m stuck inside. I’m streaming regularly and would love to have visitors stop by for a chat!

www.twitch.tv/errantsquire

See you again soon!

Who Moved My Cheese?

In leadership school we discussed the book “Who Moved My Cheese” in relation to expectations and how life often leads down unexpected paths. I can’t say a lot about it right now but this last week has had a lot of “cheese movement” moments. I have some clarity about where I’ll be but there are still some things that are up in the air. Things got pretty crazy for me this week, and I have some control but I’m also praying a lot about where God wants me to be. Before I know it I will have my answer and so there’s no reason to agonize about it now.

I went through some spell creation with Chris this week, just to see how long it would take. We’re starting to figure out that 15 step pipeline to batch or automate portions of it. That said a lot of my time this week was eaten up by the “cheese movement” in my life. I put a lot of effort into finding a way forward and at times I found I couldn’t even relax. One night in particular I didn’t sleep well at all. I do feel a peace about it now however.

The book “Who Moved My Cheese” is about 2 mice and 2 humans. Every day they all wake up and run the maze to get the cheese. Eventually the humans decide to build houses closer to the cheese in the maze and they invest a lot of personal time and effort into it. One day they all wake up and go to where the cheese has always been to find that it isn’t there. The mice take this opportunity to search the maze to find more cheese, but the humans become distraught. The humans cry, and complain wasting precious time instead of going to find new cheese.

Many of us are in that exact position right now. In 2020 we might have had plans to graduate, retire, get married, vacation, or any number of other things. I realized when I went to conventions year after year that I would try to re-create experiences from previous years only to come up short. It was important for me to realize that the moments in our lives are so special and so it’s important to really take them in because they can end at any time without warning. There have been many things that I wished went the way that I had thought, but I’m so thankful to have had the experiences I had, and I look forward to experiencing all new things!

Some of us are sitting at home crying about it, wishing things were different. Still others of us have found creative ways to discover “new cheese”. Things that are new aren’t comfortable, it’s painful to grow. After going through a lot of changes and growth I’ve experience it first hand. Right now the trick for me is to keep growing and keep moving forward as I search for my “cheese.”

Standstill

Sometimes life throws enough at you that it’s time to stop everything and really take stock of what’s been going on. I’m in a state of limbo right now and as such have lost a lot of the motivation to move forward with the game. I’m still asking if it’s even a fun experience. I’m not sure if it is.

I’m not sure where I’ll be right now, and I’ve promised my boys a better place to live when they return to me mid summer. Maybe somewhere deep inside I’m saying to myself, “I’ll start working on the game after I move into my new house and I know where things are going.” That said it’s a bit of a mistake and I need to find some time to commit to making these spell effects.

So if I’m not working on my game what am I doing with all this at home Corona Virus time? Well I still socialize a bit through my phone but I’ve gone back to playing World of Warcraft. I managed to find a good guild of dudes to chill with which has been a bit odd for me as I haven’t been social with guys in a long time. It’s been a bit of an adjustment, but it’s good to have that as I’m typically running from one thing to the next when I have my kids with me.

From a game development standpoint I do find that I’m assessing the game and thinking about how they texture and the choices that they made in the game. Who knows once I release my full game maybe I’ll make some tribute maps from the game. I really appreciate the texturing work in the game, and I’m taking notes for the maps in my game.

Overall maybe it was a good time to take a short vacation and breather after the way this year has had a lot of surprises. I feel a little bad about not working, but as long as I keep getting a little done I think it will have a positive effect when I come back full force after I move.

Tough Decisions and Gratitude

This past week I made the difficult decision to stay in the military due to the job situation that isn’t panning out because of the Corona Virus. It wasn’t an easy decision but it has given me a lot of much needed focus in my life. The next steps will be to move through the process to take back my retirement, and figure out where I will be. I promised my boys a better house when they return, although it’s difficult to say where that will be right now.

I often think about how “hard” I have it but realistically I’m very lucky and I should be counting my blessings. The more people I meet the more I understand just how hard it is for everyone. I’m especially blessed just to have a job right now in these trying times. There is a report that unemployment is at 11% but I still have a hard time believing that when a UK report said that 75% of people aren’t working. Of course that may mean that they have jobs to come back to, but the work place isn’t ready yet. Still my friend in California says that it’s just as bad as ever right now and that the recent race related riots made things a lot worse. Yes I am very lucky to be safe and secure where I am right now.

That said I had a distinct reduction in my own push to get work done on Six Aspects this week. Yes I was attending to a lot of work related things, but it does feel like because I’m secure and comfortable I’ve lost a lot of the drive to get it done. I need to re-capture that but the possibility of a move soon also has me in a state of uncertainty about the future.

Due to my choice to stay in the military I have finally closed out a chapter in one of the best relationships I’ve ever experienced. I was hoping against hope for something to happen where we would come back, or at the very least be friends but it looks like that’s just not possible now. I guess I can move on now. I still pray about it, along with prayers for my children, my own direction, the future of our nation, etc… It’s difficult because there are some times when it really does feel like I’m firing off prayers into nothingness. It’s frustrating dealing with a God that has all the excuses ready and is infallible. Many times I feel like He isn’t speaking at all. I probably just need to seek Him out more by reading my Bible and praying more often.

I guess this week is less about progress on the game and more about what I’m personally dealing with. I’m hoping that next week will be a bit better. That said on a positive note I do have more focus on what the next steps are. I have an opportunity to DJ at a local club coming up, and I’m still being as social as I can with people from my house. I took the plunge and started playing World of Warcraft again, mostly for the social aspect. I figure I’ll do this until my children are back. Investing in the stock market has also been a good way to distract myself as I’m really starting to get used to the ebb and flow of things.

Last week in Six Aspects we tightened up some simple things like feeding the escape key into a conditional statement to end the game. I talked a bit about polishing up our menu’s some more. We also looked at the “Go Button”. There is still an issue where the player is able to use it to exploit the game a bit. Not that it matters to much as it isn’t an online game, but it is something that can break the game experience. I still want to get the game out on early access this summer. It feels like we’re getting closer.

I was thinking about Six Aspects when I played World of Warcraft. I asked myself what the WoW game loop was at the most basic level. It seems to be killing a thing to get a reward rinse and repeat. I would say that the rewards in Six Aspects could be better or more engaging. I also think it might be important to have the player click on something when they receive a reward as well. We have no items in the game and that might have to be something that I have to add after early access. Random rewards is such a big deal for driving engagement as a skinner box mechanic it’s insane. It’s really difficult to just sell the game on the merits of moving troops to win battles. The incremental random payout is a big deal.

Overall I’m happy with my decision to stay in the military, but at the same time it wasn’t exactly my plan. These last few months have been very stressful for me and for people around the world. I’m glad to have the things God has given me and I will press forward to the next challenge.

Big Changes Incoming

It’s the summer time and that means that my kids go to be with their mom which opens things up for more productivity for me. That said I still have a lot of question marks that need to be worked out in the coming two weeks. I’ve resolved myself to stay in the military if I don’t have a job by then. I have a solid second interview coming so we’ll see how that goes. It will be a real relief when I have some idea where things will be going with my life soon.

Most of this past week was spent preparing for the trip to drop off my kids but I did get a couple of hours in to work on Six Aspects. I decided to relax a bit with my mentor Chris on Tuesday and just do a play through as I marked down some bugs that we came across. We talked about usability and how the game could polish up this point or that point. I’m looking for a great sound to go with the “go” button in the game. It’s going to be pressed so much that I think it will be important to give it a very satisfying sound when pressed. I also discovered some more flaws with the combat system as negative numbers kept popping up.

I fixed the negative combat damage numbers the following day by creating a check for less than zero damage and assigning a damage value of 1. The issue was that defense values could be high enough that they cause damage values to fall below zero as they are subtracted from final damage numbers.

I also found through game play that the troops were leveling up way to fast and so I pulled the experience curve down quite a bit. The big issue was I was awarding experience for each kill to the entire player squad. This means that if the enemy was the same level as the player and the player killed 4 enemies that’s a level for each troop in combat. In theory this is fine until you realize that there can be 7 enemies in a squad and there are multiple squads. Players don’t get levels awarded until the end of the level which means that they can really rack up way to much experience and gain on average 3-6 levels during a stage.

The money rewards were also tweaked a bit to reference enemy deploy costs and give some randomization. I keep having to reduce the amount of money the player is receiving as they seem to have an easy time accumulating it over the course of a stage. I suspect there will be a lot of feeling out the numbers as I make changes over the coming weeks.

I’m hoping to make some life decisions to focus so that I can turn my full attention to getting a solid early access version of the game out to players soon. I just need to pace myself and understand that it’s OK when everything doesn’t happen all at once. We just take things one step at a time to get through those big changes in our lives.

Guess high and then add 20%

Last week I guesstimated that it would take around 6 steps to get a new skill into the game but it turns out I didn’t estimate high enough. After going through the process with my mentor it turns out it’s closer to 16 steps. I should have taking a much bigger guess and then added more time to it. Speaking of which I think it’s going to be important to set some sort of goal to get all the skills built for the game. Maybe Jun 12th will be reasonable. Setting deadlines is important but sometimes it’s best to guess a little longer than my first assessment.

My mom told me that I look pretty tired, and other people say I look stressed. It’s probably all the things I have on my plate lately. The hits just keep coming but I know a lot of people have it a lot worse. Dealing with Covid 19, a job search, relationship issues, single parenting, a possible move has been a lot lately. It’s probably why I’ve been retreating into Slay the Spire a lot lately. I keep thinking to myself, “I wish I could make my game play as engaging as this game.” That said I should have a lot more understanding about where things are going in the next couple of weeks.

The Slay the Spire game cycle of having a short engaging sessions and then giving blind reveal rewards is very engaging. The closest thing I have to that is the random buff or debuff from taking over towns. Maybe I should tie it a little closer to the reputation meter. I need to surface it a little more for the player too. I think another big key to the Slay the Spire deck building model is that it gives random choices which present different archetypes and strategies to game play. I don’t know if I can do all that with what I built though. It also leverages that Skinner Box random reward system that adds so much to keep you wondering when you’re going to hit it big. Playing through a game of Slay the Spire is that rogue like feel that makes you want to keep trying your luck.

Six Aspects doesn’t have a lot of unfair moments that end the game quickly, or overpowered hard fights. Maybe I should give the game a play through to see how it feels. I haven’t done that much lately. I want to be rolling the dice in my own game to get that rush. I just need to figure out how to give it that great addictive feel.

Adding an item system to the game for early access won’t really work but it might need to be placed in the game to give players more engagement and customization. There will be a lot of content to build out if I end up doing this however. It might be better to go into the the town settling system that’s currently on hiatus.

I’m hoping to get a lot more done once my kids go to be with mom for the summer. I should be able to really buckle down to get this game to early access.

Closing in on New Early Access Release Date

Last week I finished all of the enemy troop replacements over the 12 stages to release. It’s good to have this done as I move forward. I also removed all the tutorial text from every stage after the first one. With a heavy heart I hid all the settling options from the final screen, but I’m hoping they will make a return with the full release of the game. Last week I talked about adding a random relic system to change the way the game unfolds and add replayability to the game. I feel like it meshes best with the settling system I built.

With all that said I need to work on spell effects for all the spells in the game before I can start looking at a new Early Access date. There are 50 different attacks on the spreadsheet however it’s likely that not all of them will get used. Additionally, I will likely have to come up with entirely new attacks. I think this is when I might want to look at building a system to automate building these. I remember the GDC talk where the Darkest Dungeon developers talk about how they built their system. They created a system that runs a check for names and then creates a list in software based on that. From there whenever a lookup or match has to be done it always matches as long as all the assets have unique names.

It’s a six step process to add a new spell effect/skill to the game right now. I have to create it in a spreadsheet and then I have to implement it on another spreadsheet. After I’ve done that I have to go into the script and make sure it matches up. Then I need to create the particle effect and make sure it’s being triggered from a matching name on the 3D Model in game. Occasionally I have to worry about something happening with the target which makes things a bit more complex in the case of the fireball that spawns an explosion on the enemy after the fireball hits them. Finally once everything is working I have to add a sound to the spell and at that point I have my spell effect.

It feels like it will be ambitious to complete 3 of these in one day if I’m not distracted, but maybe I’ll get into some sort of groove and flow state and be able to do it more quickly. After I get all this done I’ll focus on fulfilling the Steam requirements and set a new Early Access Release date. It’s exciting to be this far in development!

On a social note I managed to get out for a drink with a friend this past weekend. It’s so crazy to think about how much of an “abnormal” thing that is right now. I can’t wait to have some more direction on where things will be but a lot of us are in limbo lately. Some of the jobs came back with interest, but I still feel like people aren’t really hiring even if the hiring manager say they are. I’m probably just spinning my wheels there. I’m just hoping that I’ll be able to move on to the next challenge this summer, but who knows where I’ll be when the dust settles.

Let’s get these skills built out so I can get this beast to market!

Upgrades, but Something is Missing

This week I focused on building out all the enemies for the levels in the game. A similar thing happened when I got to the last stage. I stalled a little bit for about 24 hours. This seems to be something that happens a lot when I’m getting closer to the end of the project. There’s internal push back not to finish.

Chris and I continue to parse out the problems with the tactics in the game not saving after stages. The system wasn’t built well to begin with compared to the way we do things now. Also with the tactics we have available in the game there’s one choice that’s a little to powerful, and so I plan to remove it from the game. I’m a firm believer in powerful options that are to powerful removing choice from other options which means that I can remove them or try to buff up other options. In this case I feel it’s best to remove the option to target leaders. It also makes sense within the construct of combat as it’s not always easy to know who the leader is of a group

In the game time I do spend I’ve been playing a lot of “Slay the Spire”. It really helps me forget about a lot of the stress that I’m under. I’m able to become fully present to the game when I play it which can become problematic when I become less productive as a result. That said I do feel like there’s a system in the game that would make my game some more replayability. There’s a random relic system that changes game play slightly for the rogue like game. It might be interesting to build a system like that into the game. Hmmmm now that I think about it we have a system that’s not getting utilized that does have 3 options like that which is related to settling your population. Maybe I could tie some random rewards to the different options. That would add a lot more weight to the decision. I’ll think some more about it, but I like the idea as it would change the game slightly each time it’s played.

I went against my own judgment and applied to some jobs this past week. I’m working through a test right now, and it’s frustrating that it doesn’t really allow the skills I’ve built up in the game development realm to shine. I feel like I want to develop some tests specifically for game developers someday. The biggest issue is the way that data is handled and I’ve had to learn some things on the fly, even while I’m taking a timed test. Still I put a lot of work into doing the test this past weekend and I’ll be submitting it soon. It’s difficult to do a timed test during the daytime which means that I study for it during the day and take the test at night. I continue to improve though and eventually I’ll just knock it out of the park.

It’s painful going through tests and not doing well, just like a lot of other failures in life. Game developers say, “fail faster” in order to find something that really works. Self development community people say that, “you need to go through pain to have growth.” We are predisposed to do things as easily as possible to stay comfortable and avoid pain. This makes us feel good, but it also keeps us from growing. We need to face down our problems or forever be dominated by them.

It's funny how quickly things can change

This week we inched a little closer to finishing the game by focusing on what tasks need to be completed to get to early access. I’ve talked before about putting off the release which is unfortunate. I need to set a new date and really push hard to get this thing out. The issue is that I have so many things in my life that are pulling me in different directions. I’m doing my best to calm the noise down and focus but the game production has suffered.

Months ago things were a lot more clear. I had a way forward and I felt good about where things were going. It’s interesting how things in life can change so quickly. I’m really caught between the risk vs reward of most of my decision possibilities right now. Do I leave the safety of the military and try to start a second career in the wake of the largest unemployment crisis and uncertainty that the world has seen in recent memory? The answer is probably play it safe and stick around. It feels like I’m not living up to what I had planned. The biggest issue is that it’s not just myself that I have to worry about which adds another level of complexity to everything.

On the plus side I picked up my first Fiverr client this week. I’m teaching him how to use RPG Maker which is a lot of fun and not very stressful at all. I do a little groundwork to prepare and so far he seems happy enough. I should probably add some more skill based operations to see what else I can get going. I’m exploring alternative revenue streams because finding a traditional job looks pretty bad.

A lot of job prospects are asking for additional job training which would cost more money. They seem like poor prospects. It’s frustrating when I’ve taught our military for over 3,000 hours hold a bachelors, and 2 associates degrees and I’m not allowed to simply step into a teaching position. Oh no sir, you see we will need you to do additional training to get a “teaching degree” in our state for that which will cost $5,000. It feels like an unnecessary road block when I’ve proven that I’m more than capable to do that job. I guess I’ll just stick to teaching people on Fiverr to make money now. I can’t help but feel that our grade school, and college educations are getting out played by people online with computers and web cams. There were many times in college when I was directed to YouTube videos, which presented the material that the college had not made.

Job hunting feels so bad that right now it’s time that I can’t afford to spend as it has little chance of reaping a benefit unless the economy turns around. I feel it’s more likely we will see a second lock down in response to increased widespread virus infections.

I even spoke with my parents this week to explore going back home to stay a while and it seems like a poor prospect, and it wouldn’t position me well. I would be kissing my dream of becoming a game developer goodbye. It’s funny how quickly things can change, but it’s important to keep moving forward.